Monday, September 13, 2010

Look at it through Johari window

Sometimes we receive good topic sources to write and share our thoughts but most of the time, we missed them due to lack of time to write.  After several missed opportunities, I firmly decided to find time to write this up.  In the last weeks I was busy with some official and personal matters. Attending to my sister’s house warming also one of among them, they had invited to very close relations to that occasion and had been arranged a whole night religious activity instead of a party. That provided an opportunity to meet many relations after several years and talk about each other or anything as they wish.

After many looping topics, we were talking about driving. One of my uncle told that he has fallen in sleep while drives one day. Many others who were listening to this responded with their experiences and advise. Most interesting thing of this discussion is one of relations asked what part of our body sleeps first. Really it was hard questions to answer though look simple. I said eye ball while others named some other parts. As he refers further we justified with reasons too. Unfortunately he never accepted any of our answers as correct. In accordance with the tools we use to measure a people on this earth, he is just a small businessman, if we compare him against other members who participated to discussion, he can not be rated as educated or experienced person too. Whatever is the status level in the society for this man, he was able to dominate the discussion and kept everyone in silence for few minutes and create brains storm.  I think this context created a boiling uneasiness among others who believed born to lead, consult, or teach. certainly, it was bit difficult to tolerate or absorb the pressure created on very intelligent class people (VICP) by throwing a simple man's simple question.  

Since the all participants attempt were unsuccessful, he said answer is the ear. With this answer he was bombarded with a load of questions and he had to present all the things he knows to justify his answer. I don’t know how far this answer is acceptable or not but in accordance with his justification, our ear closes its transmission before eyes close and that's why we wake up with sound. 
However, I don’t want chase after him, his answer or the evidence submitted by him to prove his thought. Instead of that, I would like give you  that opportunity to think a while and argue with that answer and find information. My objective of bringing this story in to your attention is reminding you a well-known theory which is learnt and practiced by veterans in many fields. It is none other than Johari window. See how that incident helps us to understand Johari window.

What body part sleep first? .. Ears...!!! I don’t know what I don’t know....***    

Monday, August 30, 2010

Once a moron once a model..

One of my friends spoke to me little while ago from Sweden. He has flown far long from here, his motherland. (Not as an asylum state seeker)

When I hear from him, I couldn’t stop my memories reversing me to fifteen years history.  One of my best friends house was the free lodge for many of us at that time. Really it was like a hostel rather than house. His family members tolerated us. We didn’t feel it belong to another family since their kindness. There was a boy who just passed his teen years. Being a relation of my friend he was fallen in to family members group of the house occupants.

I can still figure out the posture of he was watching TV and resting on red couch in the sitting room. He never missed any English movie telecasted on TV. The rest of the time he spent on thinking, planning, and dreaming to fly abroad to find treasure.  His style, pattern, vocabulary and interests were more compatible western culture than local context. I am sure that most of people thought he is moron going waste his future by chasing an objective that he can’t reach.  He was an alien to some people since he was not inline with their thinking pattern. Many people advised him to give up his dream because it will not come true.

But, this boy insisted and adhered to the further his dream while surfing on big western cities mentally where ha has seen on movies. He neglected all the troubles, difficulties, pains he had to overcome on his way to reach his goal. Sometimes he lost everything what he had, including love, respect, recognition and social acceptance while he taste bitterness of failures but he tend to protect  one thing secure. It is his dream to going through big cities in the world and earns his livelihood.

Today, that man called me from Sweden, after passing many cities that he dreamed to roam.

I just brought this story to your attention since it worthwhile to study. It says us how NLP theory works with people and combination of attitude, interest and motivation drive a person to reach his target.

GOOD LUCK MY FRIEND Uxxxxxxx..!!!  

Sunday, August 29, 2010

My new theory is tea theory...

I commenced blogging in 2007, most of them were real notes to my students, trainees and participants who are attending to my programs. Since I knew, my blog comments are used as reference materials by them, I tried my best to be formal, you all know that it is very difficult for me..hahha.. However, I decided to change my track finally..  I have no idea to make use blog as vehicle to deliver my notes further. I decided t use blog to say things as I see it. (Do not forget that I wear spectacles because of my sight weakness)

I think this is one of wise decisions I ever took. (I know that you will not agree with me that “one of wise decisions” part because according to you rating I have not taken any wise decision yet. Isn’t?)  I said like that because of one reason, now I don’t want jump in to many blogs written by me, under different identities, to share with many of my other friends with different interests.

So now onward, I write to all of my different kind of friends through one single blog.  This is it. Do you think can I do this? I think yes, I can, because I know one good strategy to do it. That was taught me by the office assistant worked at my previous workplace. I will tell you that theory and story behind it, it is worthwhile to share.

Making tea for the staff was one of assigned tasks to office aid at my previous work place.  It was not very easy job because some of people need it with little sugar as some other asked with more sugar and many more things like that. Many different requests and choices were there. The total staff was about sixty and if I say in other words nearly sixty different requests were there. (In accordance with the theory of every one is special in this world…hahaha). Though you don’t believe it, he delivered all these requirement satisfactorily he managed and still managing it. (Don’t misunderstand this he is not another god of handling the catering department)

Do you know how he does it? I found it.(eureka....!!!!)

One day I was having a chat with my visitor close to the pantry where he was preparing tea. I ordered to prepare a cup of tea for my visitor too. Then my visitor requested to make it with less sugar. While I was having a chat with my friend, I saw he was making a big container of tea for all of us, after finishing it, poured tea in to small cups for serving. He packed nicely them on the tray and carried to us and offered. My visitor touched one cup of tea while thanking to the office aid. Offering gratitude smile to visitor in response, office aid asked to “take the other” cup of tea and said it is for him.

That happen so and my visitor left after having tea but my curiosity to know the secret of making different kind of tea in one container was remained with me. I just called him and asked how he did it without noticing me while I was starring at him and his tea making process.

He simply replied “Sir, no body can prepare tea cup by cup according to sixty, seventy special requirements but I do that when I serve, and then they know that is specially made for them”

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Do it in public...!!!

Did you feel your body has stiffened when you stand up to address a group? 
Did you feel your knees are shaking when you speak to a group? 
Did you feel your mouth throw words and you're frozen? 

If you've felt like that, be proud of it, because you've experienced that since you've  gone to speak in public. There are some other people in the world. Their hearts are cringing when they hear the words of “Public speaking”, even long before see the audience. That is why I said, “be proud of you,” because you are far better than they are. At least you have had guts to walk to stage and appear in front of a group. 

According to the surveys, Public speaking is the number one phobia in the world. Psychologist say reason might be result of experiences faced by them at their younger ages. I believe most of us should have experienced something very similar to this when we were forced to give a presentation in front of class at our early age. Whatever is the reason or cause, we do not want to worry about that anymore because some other scholars have found solutions to eradicate that phobia. If anybody wants to speak in public indeed, there are ways and means available now for earning that skill. Hence, I say you again be happy if you really want to be a good public speaker, opportunity is there for you. 

I wish to publish some of those valuable hints here, that will help you to improve your presentation skills further. If you also one of persons dreaming to become good public speaker, these suggestions will help you to overcome yours speaking anxiety and act as super performer. 

I tagged those hints as “Five Keys of Public Speaker.” If you have these five keys in your pocket always, you can carry the audience where they expect to go and show everything what they wish to see. So I advice you to see that yourself, are these magic keys with you, before you are leaving for public addressing or doing it in public.  

Be Prepared: Preparation is the first and most important of all. Pay your fullest attention to be prepared for presentation. That makes you relax and improve your confidence to give a best speech. Remember proper preparation prevents poor presentations 

Map in Mind: Keep all things in your mind as one picture. Give signs for all-important points that you wish to tell the audience. Develop the picture according to your presentation plan. See whole speech in one picture. It is so easy to explain the picture you see in mind than memorizing the text, digits and phrases. 

Synchronize the sound and action: Your voice is main vehicle, which carry your message to audience. They like to listen something in live unless they would have to buy a CD and listen to it. High and low pitches, timely pauses, emphasizing and repeating can add life to your voice build a bridge between you and audience. The effectiveness of this effort can be enhanced by dramatizing it applying the appropriate body language. 

Use serious humor: Do not try to decorate your valuable speech with artificial jokes. Humor is an essential for good speech but speaker should make use it natural manner without minimizing the quality of speech. 

Bring audience to stage: Your eye contact and amiable approach should use to link the audience and you. If you can make your audience to feel that they are part of a dialogue it is the optimum any presenter can reach. 

I am confident that my thoughts have provide you some hints and physical and mental techniques you can use immediately to help you reduce your anxiety and perform as smart and professional speaker. So study them, understand them, practice them, then those wil become yours very soon.

Now you can do it in public...!!!
 
By Wasantha Tennakoon

That makes you a leader...

Some school of thought says leaders are born. Some of others say leaders are made. Whatsoever, leaders are leaders. Hence, it is worthwhile studying what traits and qualities have made them as leaders, instead of arguing on it. 

As defined, all the great leaders have ability to mobilize human energy and create environments that inspire individuals and groups to achieve their full potential. If you have monitored winning leaders, you might be able to recognize some exceptional qualities in them. Those are the traits place them above from the rest. We can categorize those traits in to 10 main areas. 

If you also one of dreaming to be future leaders. Be insisting on those qualities because that can make you a leader. Certainly, these “Golden Traits” can make you an exceptional person from the rest of average people. 

Rule #1. Leader knows about himself. 
Leaders should know what type of persons they are and about their own qualities, characteristics, strengths and weaknesses. What they are doing and they want to do. What others are expecting from him? 

Rule #2. Leader knows well about associate members 
Leader has better understanding about members of the team. Leader knows about members’ attributes, knowledge, experience, skills, and attitudes. This understanding enhances the leader’s ability to find right person for right job and lead the team to achieve its objectives. 

Rule#3. Leader utilizes command prudently. 
Leader is the hub when work with group of individuals. Leader is the controlling point and manages the smart individuals as well as weak subordinates. Great leaders use their power for the benefit of team but without embarrassing others by it
Rule#4. Leader sees the picture clearly. 
Leader knows where he should go with his team and what he should have to accomplish. He sees the positive and negative sides. He has ability to evaluate failures and achievements accurately. Never drive their teams to celebrate fake victories. They see the things in right form, take right decision, and lead the team to success. 

Rule#5. Leader set examples. 
True leaders play their roles properly. Their dedication, determination and discipline set examples to others. Though leader is not multi skilled person necessarily, should be a reliable person to the team in every sense. 

Rule#6. Leader delegates power and responsibility. 
Good leaders know to network the team through sharing the responsibility and delegating power with members. This exercise builds faith in member and makes them feel they are recognized. That will induce them to perform well their roles in the team. 

Rule#7. Leader communicates effectively. 
Communication effectiveness is the thumb rule of leadership. Without communication, skills never can be a leader. Leader has big role to play as good communicator within the team as well as out of it. We cannot find any leader from history poor in communication skills. It is that much important and compulsory for any leader. 

Rule#8. Leader is good Architect. 
The planning skill of a Leader enhances the ability of visualizing the result. Therefore, leaders are well aware of materials and mechanism of making that idea in to reality. 

Rule#9. Leader guards the team. 
True leaders act valiantly when moving the team towards failure or danger. They face the challenges with confidence while encouraging and empowering the members to conquer the failure and drive to victory. 

Rule#10. Leader makes leaders. 
Great teachers, guides and facilitators are living in all good leaders. They have burning desire in developing people. They work hard to groom second line leadership. 

By Wasantha Tennakoon

You can communicate effectively...

Since our birth, we have been communicating for years. Have you ever thought to improve your communication skills? Be an active communicator? If you have not thought about that, I would like invite to start it from now on. It does not ask many things from you. Only thing you have to do is paying a little attention than ever before.  

Majority of us have born with ability of hearing, talking, seeing, feeling, and moving our body. Except little number of people, all others use these abilities in typical manner. If we have put little effort to make use those abilities innovatively and effectively that could produce big change in us. Especially when we concentrate on communication factor, our little effort lifts us from average level to exceptional. Shifting our behavioral pattern from passive to active would be enough to make this marvelous change. 

I would like to propose you to experiment this yourself. As you know already SoundBody and Visuals are playing vital role in commutation process. Try yourself to talk in right tone at right pitch when you speak. Learn to synchronize body movementgesturesposturesfacial expressions and eye contacts as you communicate. If you can apply those properly, that will lift you from average to exceptional communicator level. Certainly, you will be an effective communicator who has ability to register your image in any audience.
By Wasantha Tennakoon